Three's A Crowd: Two Is Incest

Democrats and Republicans agree on one thing and one thing only. Kabuki Theater notwithstanding.

On its superficial surface, one would surmise that Democrats and Republicans are diametrically opposed. That there is a substantive difference between the two. That they cannot agree on anything. This is nothing more than sociopolitical Kabuki theater. Let us exhume this political necropolis and autopsy the duopolistic monopoly. As we crack open the chest cavity of the rotting corpse, the odor of putrescent flesh will be a bit overwhelming.

I suggest that the faint of heart hold their proverbial noses.

The Covenant: Tricks Are For Kids

In street parlance a “trick” is the client of a prostitute. A trick can also be an illusion performed by magicians. It is also a breakfast cereal. For kids.

Both Democrats and Republicans portray themselves as ideological opposites, yet beneath the surface, they are shrewd business partners protecting a shared monopoly. They have engineered a political landscape that makes competition nearly impossible. Through mechanisms like closed primaries, which exclude independent voters, gerrymandered districts that ensure safe seats, and campaign finance laws favoring established players.

This duopoly does not merely survive, it thrives and will often cannibalize. Laws that vary by state create labyrinthine barriers to ballot access for third-party candidates, requiring thousands of signatures and astronomical fees. Even presidential debates—arguably the most public arena for policy discussion—are hosted by a commission run jointly by the two major parties, ensuring that outsiders are kept outside. When it comes to preserving power, the kabuki masks come off and the true face of bipartisan collusion is revealed. And it’s an ugly M.F.

Because in the end, it’s all about the Benjamins.

Six In One Hand, Half-a-Dozen In The Other.

For me to attempt an allusion to illusion only fornicates with delusion and the offspring from the threesome are rather undesirable. In other words, I don’t spend much energy on attempting to reanimate the dead. Despite perpetual Gallup polls that consistently show that a majority of Amerikans believe a third party is needed, when the matter of a third (or fourth) party is mentioned to the participants in either binary party it is immediately dismissed. It is not casually dismissed, it is dismissed with vim and vigor.

Nonetheless, the discontent cannot be denied and beneath the surface of that discontent lies a desperation for political diversity. Poll after poll reveals a consistent pattern: the majority of Amerikans no longer feel represented by either major party. In a 2023 Gallup poll, a record-high 63% of respondents said a third major party is needed because the Democrats and Republicans “do such a poor job representing the people.” The trend isn’t new.

Independent voters now make up the largest political bloc in the country, surpassing either party in affiliation. This is a national shift. The imposed false binary bullshit is not resonating. Political nuance, pragmatic solutions, and ideologies untethered from establishment orthodoxy are the only things that might save a declining nation and every person with enough intelligence to win third place in an idiot contest knows it. And yet, this groundswell of demand is met with radio silence—or worse, derision—by the entrenched duopoly. It’s not apathy driving political disengagement; it’s the absence of viable choice.

Anal orifice.

The illusion of choice is not democracy. When two entrenched parties control the levers of power, the ballot becomes less an instrument of expression and more a ritual of routine. America’s political stagnation isn’t the result of voter indifference, it’s the consequence of systemic exclusion. The demand for a third party is not radical; it’s rational. It’s a corrective to the performative governance and manufactured outrage that have left millions politically homeless.

True representation cannot emerge from theatrical conflict until the stage is expanded, diverse voices elevated and unshackled from the binary script. The duopoly has written its own rules for long enough. It’s time the audience stood up and rewrote the play.

The Gang of Eight Gangbangers

The Amerikan political system is an organized crime syndicate replete with names such as:

• The Ohio Gang- A group of politicians and industry leaders close to President Warren G. Harding in the 1920s, many of whom were involved in financial scandals like the Teapot Dome scandal.

• The Pork Chop Gang- A group of Democratic legislators from rural North Florida, active from the 1930s to the 1960s, who aimed to maintain segregation and disproportionate political power for their region.

• The Gang of Six- Multiple bipartisan groups of senators have been referred to as the "Gang of Six" over time, often for their work on specific legislative issues like healthcare reform or immigration debate.

• The Gang of Seven- A group of conservative freshman Republicans in the early 1990s who focused on fighting corruption.

• The Gang of Eight- Is set of eight “leaders” within the United States Congress who are briefed on classified intelligence matters by the executive branch. Specifically, the Gang of Eight includes the leaders of each of the two parties from both the Senate and House of Representatives. This includes the chairs and ranking minority members of both the Senate Committee and House Committee for intelligence as set forth by 50 U.S.C. § 3093(c)

• The "Squad"- While not using the exact term "gang," this informal coalition of progressive and left-wing members of the Democratic Caucus has expanded from four members to nine following the 2022 elections.

Then there is the Gang of Nine Supreme Court. The triad completed by the national TIC, or thug in chief. A Don named Smitty.

The Amerikan political system exquisitely meets every one of the legal requirements to be indicted under RICO Law. A corrupt, toxic and corrosive sociopolitical cesspool that the duopoly monopoly uses for mutual benefit. To enrich itself at the expense of its ignorant, unsuspecting and sometimes innocent victims over which it holds dominion. It’s spent sulphur stench permeating every branch of government. So much so that as one surveys the checks and balances landscape one is unable to determine which is the most corrupt: the courts and judiciary, the legislative branch, or the executive branch. It all depends on the direction of the wind at a given moment.

Port of RICO

RICO, or the Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act, is a federal law in the United States designed to combat organized crime and racketeering. It allows prosecutors to target individuals involved in a pattern of criminal activity connected to a criminal enterprise, even if they aren't directly involved in every crime. Before I continue know that you have the right to remain silent.

To be indicted under RICO, the government must prove a "pattern of racketeering activity" connected to an "enterprise.” This means at least two acts of racketeering activity (predicate crimes) must have occurred within a 10-year period. These predicate acts must be related to an "enterprise," which can be a legitimate or illegitimate organization.

As I burst, with mirth.

The RICO statute defines "enterprise" broadly, including any individual, partnership, corporation, association, or other legal entity, or any group of individuals associated in fact. The enterprise must be a distinct entity from the individuals committing the crimes and it must be shown that the enterprise affects interstate commerce.

The Pattern of Racketeering Activity requirement requires at least two acts of racketeering activity within a 10-year period. These acts must be related to the "enterprise.” Beam me up, Scotty.

Racketeering activity is defined by the RICO statute and includes a list of 35 federal and state crimes, such as drug trafficking, wire fraud, mail fraud, bribery, extortion, murder, and kidnapping. The acts must amount to, or pose a threat of, continuing criminal activity. Lastly, The defendant must be shown to be associated with the enterprise, either by participating in the racketeering activity or having some connection to it.

Now cometh the eternal quandary, how does the criminal execute his or her own prosecution?

The Theater of Conflict

In the great masquerade of American politics, two parties dominate the stage with rehearsed outrage and choreographed conflict. Yet when it comes to the one issue that could upend their control—a viable third party—they strike perfect harmony in silence. The United States isn’t just positioned for a new political movement; it’s gasping for it. The kabuki theater of what is presented as democracy has grown stale, and the curtain must rise on a new act.

Amerika is not suffering from a lack of ideas, it’s suffering from a lack of access. Until the bipartisan criminal syndicate and cartel is indicted, prosecuted and punished what is billed to be “democracy” will continue to look more like theater than governance. The third party isn’t a luxury. It’s a lifeline.

The Amerikan political arena is a stylized stage where party loyalty Trumps public service, and outrage is meticulously choreographed. The term “kabuki theater” is no exaggeration—it encapsulates the exaggerated gestures, rehearsed feuds, and artificial antagonism that dominate the news cycle. That’s why it has a cheesy reality- television “star” running it…into the ground.

While each party claims to champion wildly different visions for the nation, their theatrics often serve to obscure the real show behind the curtain: a shared interest in preserving the binary structure that guarantees their relevance. Take, for example, government shutdowns or budget standoffs, though presented as ideological clashes, they always resolve in deals that protect institutional power.

Meanwhile, debates over third-party inclusion are avoided entirely, excluded from airtime and public dialogue. The drama is convincing, but it’s ultimately distraction—an elaborate performance designed not to enlighten, but to enrage, and above all, to maintain control. Voters aren’t just spectators, they’ are paying customers at a show that refuses to change its cast. They are tricks.

Both Republicans and Democrats uphold, perpetuate and applaud a system that resists pluralism. In the same funky breath, they also manage to somehow manipulate their minds into believing that this lack of pluralism, of which the opposite is singularism, is democracy. Anyone capable of that level of self inflicted delusion and willful ignorance is a person that can be convinced of absurdities, and if I can convince you of absurdities, I can convince you to commit atrocities as we can clearly see in Palestine. Here as well and it is going to get quantitatively worse.

As I have matriculated through this life as a writer, thinker, man and person, I have longed for one thing. I have not longed for equity. First of all, I don’t necessarily want to be “equal”— that all depends on equal to what. I have not longed for inclusion; perhaps I do not wish to be in your club. I have not longed for fairness; only a fool would say that. I have not longed for any material thing as I have lost more material things than many will ever have. And I most certainly relinquished longing for the folly of love right about the time I stopped believing in Santa Claus.

What I have longed for, and continue to search for, is intellectual honesty. It is that heretofore fruitless search that keeps me alive. Rather absurd given the facts. Isn’t it?

I started out talking about three types of tricks: the client of the prostitute, the deluded audience of the magician and the kid’s cereal. Whatever type trick applies, just remain cognizant that it’s a trick. Baby.